My act is based on my life. — Kathy Griffin

My act has always reflected what’s going on in my life. — Kathy Griffin

Life is adventure. Travel is adventure at a different address. — Kathy Griffin

I was detaIned at every sIngle passport. — Kathy Griffin

I am in love with Larry David. — Kathy Griffin

I love Mariah Carey. Remember the breakdown? I loved the breakdown. — Kathy Griffin

No one teaches you how to do this. How do you let go of someone who you love so much? — Kathy Griffin

No, I love Montreal… I think I love Montreal more than Montreal loves me… I love the food there. — Kathy Griffin

I also love Mole, the unsung hero of reality programming. — Kathy Griffin

I love to make fun of fashion because it is just so silly. — Kathy Griffin

I’m saying that she (Whitney Houston) looks great for a singer… the way Courtney Love is a singer. — Kathy Griffin

I love to work. I love doing standup. — Kathy Griffin

I prefer being known for my stand–up because I write it. I love being an actor, and saying other people’s words is great. But then, when I do stand–up, I love getting my own point of view out there. — Kathy Griffin

That’s what I loved about Temptation Island. I don’t even know why they did it. — Kathy Griffin

At St. Bernardine’s the nuns never liked me. Especially Sister Mary Bitch–and–a–Half. I think that was her biblical name. — Kathy Griffin

The beauty about the D–list is that people who are on it probably don’t know they are. — Kathy Griffin

That’s life when you’re on the D–list. — Kathy Griffin

I feel more people can relate to the D–list than the A–list. — Kathy Griffin

I also don’t have a desire to be on the A–list. I feel more people can relate to the D–list than the A–list. — Kathy Griffin

I’m on every worst–dressed list imaginable. — Kathy Griffin

I have what I call A–list moments, but believe me, I’m still on the D–list. — Kathy Griffin

I identify with the regular person, because that is who I am. — Kathy Griffin

Gwyneth Paltrow names her kid Apple. I’m not going to let that stand. — Kathy Griffin

I constantly say things that I regret. I mortify myself constantly. — Kathy Griffin

So yes, I say things I regret constantly, and I just can’t help it. — Kathy Griffin

I’m always listening and watching; my ear is like a boom mike. And judging, frankly. Constantly judging. — Kathy Griffin

Oh, I constantly say things that I regret. I mortify myself constantly. But that’s just part of the deal. I’m not really sure what’s going to come out of my mouth. — Kathy Griffin

I did feel very sexy and desirable. Those prisoners looked at me like no man ever did. I don’t care how many people they killed. — Kathy Griffin

When I see you, I smile. When I touch you, I feel you. When I kiss you, I love you! — Kathy Griffin

I do feel I’m kind of a magnet for crazy, and if there isn’t enough crazy, I will insert myself in a situation that I feel has comedy potential. — Kathy Griffin

The thing that bums me out about ‘The Real World’ is I don’t want to believe that teenagers are that stupid. — Kathy Griffin

I do road gigs occasionally but I don’t want to go out on the road for months at a time. — Kathy Griffin

I apologize in my real life all the time. I say ridiculous things, I make mistakes constantly. But when I’m on stage, I’m at a microphone… it’s a joke! — Kathy Griffin

It is a challenge, with the global fame, to try to act like I put my pants on one leg at a time, when in fact I have Pippa Middleton help me put my pants on every morning. She’s my lady–in–waiting as well. — Kathy Griffin

I have a no–apology policy. No apologies for jokes. I apologize in my real life all the time. I say ridiculous things, I make mistakes constantly. But when I’m on stage, I’m at a microphone it’s a joke! — Kathy Griffin

I am no longer sorry, the whole outrage was b.s., the whole thIng got so blown out of proportIon and I lost everybody. — Kathy Griffin

To give up my job as a temp and actually make a living doing comedy, it was staggering. — Kathy Griffin

Have I gone too far? — Kathy Griffin

I’m also doing a special for Comedy Central called Autobiography. It’s going to be a spoof of Biography. — Kathy Griffin

I have no limits, no filter, no class, no poise. No decorum. Just fun. — Kathy Griffin

I’m a female in comedy, so of course I want there to be more women on ‘SNL’, and women of color. — Kathy Griffin