It’s not that the Irish are cynical. It’s rather that they have a wonderful lack of respect for everything and everybody. — Brendan Behan

Other people have a nationality. The Irish and the Jews have a psychosis. — Brendan Behan

If it was raining soup, the Irish would go out with forks. — Brendan Behan

The English and Americans dislike only some Irish––the same Irish that the Irish themselves detest, Irish writers––the ones that think. — Brendan Behan

When two men fight over a woman it’s the fight they want, not the woman. — Brendan Behan

The terrorist is the one with the small bomb. — Brendan Behan

What an author likes to write most is his signature on the back of a cheque. — Brendan Behan

I only take a drink on two occasions–when I’m thirsty and when I’m not. — Brendan Behan

He was born an Englishman and remained one for years. — Brendan Behan

No yesterdays are ever wasted for those who give themselves to today. — Brendan Behan

Shakespeare said pretty well everything and what he left out, James Joyce, with a judge from meself, put in. — Brendan Behan

The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less. — Brendan Behan

When I came back to Dublin I was courtmartialed in my absence and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence. — Brendan Behan

A pedestrian ought to be legally allowed to toss at least one hand grenade at a motorist every day. — Brendan Behan

When I’m talking to people I like to stop and quote myself. My quotes have a way of spicing up conversation. — Brendan Behan

Nothing hurts more than the friendly letter that one never got around to writing. — Brendan Behan

Ninety–seven saint days a year wouldn’t affect the theater, but two Yom Kippurs would ruin it. — Brendan Behan

I think weddings are sadder than funerals, because they remind you of your own wedding. You can’t be reminded of your own funeral because it hasn’t happened. But weddings always make me cry. — Brendan Behan

A quotation in a speech, article or book is like a rifle in the hands of an infantryman. It speaks with authority. — Brendan Behan

God forgive us–but most of us grew up to be the sort of men our mothers warned us against. — Brendan Behan

Other people’s interruptions of your work are relatively insignificant compared with the countless times you interrupt yourself. — Brendan Behan

Scream at God if that’s the only thing that will get results. — Brendan Behan

I am married to Beatrice Salkeld, a painter. We have no children, except me. — Brendan Behan

All publicity is good, except an obituary notice. — Brendan Behan

What the hell difference does it make, left or right? There were good men lost on both sides. — Brendan Behan

The prospect of success in achieving our most cherished dream is not without its terrors. Who is more deprived and alone than the man who has achieved his dream? — Brendan Behan

At the innermost core of all loneliness is a deep and powerful yearning for union with one’s lost self. — Brendan Behan

That you, sister. May you be the mother of a bishop. — Brendan Behan

I wish I’d been a mixed infant. — Brendan Behan

The most important things to do in the world are to get something to eat, something to drink and somebody to love you. — Brendan Behan

If you greatly desire something, have the guts to stake everything on obtaining it. — Brendan Behan

I was court–martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence. — Brendan Behan